16 1 / 2014

I mentioned how there was a bit of progress with J.
So after I got the most honest and helpful message from a fabulous Tumblr woman of wisdom, I realized she was right. Only I can heal myself. The best revenge is to be happy, healthy and living out my best days. (Wise woman, y’all).
I realized, last night, that I needed to have an open dialogue with J about my feelings and put everything on the table.  Bottling it in was what was hurting me to my core and texting is not the appropriate way to express feelings.
I called about a question I had and then I brought up the whole thing about the chance I may see them together next week.
I apologized for my outburst (via text), but that he has to understand that this is still new. We’ve only been separated since Thanksgiving and I am trying to work through the hurt and anger (with a therapist, too). I told him that I really do want him to be happy.  When he’s happy, it’s better for our child. It’s better for J, too.  I, obviously, don’t like to see anyone I care about upset.
J is the father of my child and I will love him in a way until the day I die. We are a team and to kick ass a team, we have to be in synch and respectful and kind to one another, regardless if the other person has a significant other or not. 
I am really trying to work on this.  I will continue to try and be happy for him and her.  It will take a longer time to truly accept her, but it will happen.  It has to.  I can’t carry around the anger and disgust any longer.  It’s too heavy and it’s not cute.
I have to focus on the awesome things in my life…A dreamy awesome son, fabulous family, amazing friends (and Tumblrs), a job I am in love with, a boss I respect deeply, a fabulous UK vacation coming up, more books than I could ever dream of, exciting new adventures…it’s all at my fingertips.
I’m ready to let go of the pain. I am ready to surrender that to heal. I am ready to go out there and kick ass and take names and smile until it hurts. I’m ready to laugh until I cry. I’m ready to kiss a handsome man (or two). I’m ready to travel and explore. I’m ready to re-learn a language I love.  I am ready to tackle new projects and work strategies. I am ready to carpe diem!
As my favorite fictional character says…
"Nothing’s holding me back anymore. I know what I want, and I’m gonna get it."
It’s MY time and I’m ready!

I mentioned how there was a bit of progress with J.

So after I got the most honest and helpful message from a fabulous Tumblr woman of wisdom, I realized she was right.

Only I can heal myself. The best revenge is to be happy, healthy and living out my best days. (Wise woman, y’all).

I realized, last night, that I needed to have an open dialogue with J about my feelings and put everything on the table.  Bottling it in was what was hurting me to my core and texting is not the appropriate way to express feelings.

I called about a question I had and then I brought up the whole thing about the chance I may see them together next week.

I apologized for my outburst (via text), but that he has to understand that this is still new. We’ve only been separated since Thanksgiving and I am trying to work through the hurt and anger (with a therapist, too). I told him that I really do want him to be happy.  When he’s happy, it’s better for our child. It’s better for J, too.  I, obviously, don’t like to see anyone I care about upset.

J is the father of my child and I will love him in a way until the day I die. We are a team and to kick ass a team, we have to be in synch and respectful and kind to one another, regardless if the other person has a significant other or not. 

I am really trying to work on this.  I will continue to try and be happy for him and her.  It will take a longer time to truly accept her, but it will happen.  It has to.  I can’t carry around the anger and disgust any longer.  It’s too heavy and it’s not cute.

I have to focus on the awesome things in my life…A dreamy awesome son, fabulous family, amazing friends (and Tumblrs), a job I am in love with, a boss I respect deeply, a fabulous UK vacation coming up, more books than I could ever dream of, exciting new adventures…it’s all at my fingertips.

I’m ready to let go of the pain. I am ready to surrender that to heal. I am ready to go out there and kick ass and take names and smile until it hurts. I’m ready to laugh until I cry. I’m ready to kiss a handsome man (or two). I’m ready to travel and explore. I’m ready to re-learn a language I love.  I am ready to tackle new projects and work strategies. I am ready to carpe diem!

As my favorite fictional character says…

"Nothing’s holding me back anymore. I know what I want, and I’m gonna get it."

It’s MY time and I’m ready!

  1. savannapatriceparrish reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  2. ihatemondaysblog reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  3. that-girl-wanted-freeedom reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  4. liebekenntkeinegrenze reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  5. badbtchesimyourleader reblogged this from martzt and added:
    Follow my health and fitness blog for motivation and inspiration. Follow me on my fitness journey! healthyishappenin...
  6. rainydaysunflower reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  7. martzt reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  8. one-of-thewallflowers reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  9. helibelle reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  10. omg-yourefreakingawesome reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  11. we-both-hate-this reblogged this from itssnoworneverrr
  12. itssnoworneverrr reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  13. mokkies reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  14. perf3ct-imperfecti0ns reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  15. queen-of-spontaneity reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  16. graceismyhero reblogged this from verymuchmee
  17. maxmostax reblogged this from verymuchmee
  18. verymuchmee reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  19. we-just-roll-along reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  20. modest-goddess-believer reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  21. a-sarge15 reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  22. lenox-ave reblogged this from ronsgranger
  23. obenta reblogged this from chaoticroad
  24. ronsgranger reblogged this from chaoticroad
  25. toss-love-tokens reblogged this from chaoticroad
  26. chaoticroad reblogged this from wineandglitterplease
  27. 2-rare reblogged this from wineandglitterplease